Carta aberta: como é ser mulher transexual em Bauru

A experiência e o relato de Agnes Analua Barbosa, mulher trans, negra, sobre a cidade e seus movimentos sociais

Coluna publicada em 30 de janeiro de 2018

Com Erica Malunguinho, à direita, primeira deputada transgênero da Assembleia Legislativa, Agnes, à esquerda, participou de uma conversa sobre a vida de pessoas trans no Brasil (Foto: Arquivo/Reprodução)
Por Agnes Analua Barbosa, colunista do Jornal Dois

O Brasil ainda é o país que mais mata mulheres trans e travestis no mundo inteiro, superando o segundo lugar (México com 256 mortes de 2008–2016), e contabiliza o triplo de homicídios comparado ao 2º lugar. Em um período de oito anos, nosso país matou mais de 800 mulheres transexuais, se ainda ignorarmos falhas na contagem dos crimes cometidos, que muitas vezes negligencia casos e trata como: “homens vestidos de mulheres”. Essa coluna eu escrevo para todos os habitantes da região interiorana de São Paulo, e especificamente para os bauruenses, dos mais desconstruídos aos 60% que votaram no presidente eleito, Jair Bolsonaro. Pode ser impactante para uma pequena parcela da população que se envolve com a militância e resistência da cidade ser comparada com fascistas, mas isso é necessário quando vocês reproduzem a transfobia “sem limites” e não se apresentam dispostos a mudar de opinião.

Ano passado fui cativada pela arte da poesia, que em Bauru conta com um movimento forte poético, e a interessante e libertadora experiência de participar do Sarau das Mulheres. Aconteceu na Praça Rui Barbosa, com a mestre de cerimônia que responde pelo seu nome artístico Poexistindo, numa marcha pela luta da igualdade de gênero sendo organizada pelo coletivo feminista Resiste Mulher — ao qual eu dispenso comentários pelos sucessivos ataques transfóbicos à comunidade trans.

Neste dia, do Sarau das Mulheres, superando o fato de ser chamada consecutivamente pelo pronome masculino, o que foi um fato infeliz, eu pude ter a chance de declamar a minha poesia acerca da afetividade trans. “A Travesti Quer Um Beijo”, desenrola a minha vida amorosa e do o amor para mulheres marginalizadas que é como ter um coração arrancado de vossos peitos, literalmente. A ideia de declamar esse poema foi gerada de um descontentamento da minha parte para com os moradores desta cidade e como eles entendem a afetividade e sexualidade de mulheres trans e travestis, ou melhor dizendo: como eles não entendem nada sobre sexualidade e gênero e a estagnação desse pensamento obsoleto e ultrapassado de que homens que se auto declaram héteros necessitam expressar que os mesmos ao ficarem com mulheres transexuais ou travestis perdem essa mesma identidade.

Poderia citar em uma grande lista sujeitos que são respeitados e têm uma ótima posição política e artística em Bauru de homens que me negaram afetividade mesmo sem o meu intuito de doá-la, e que me colocaram em uma posição masculina e são reverenciados como Homens de Luta, envolvidos que estão m movimentos locais. Primeiramente, os que estão na luta pela classe e refutam o movimento transexual e de raça, na ideia de que estamos todos unidos pela camada trabalhista e que os assuntos que permeiam a classe como gênero e raça, não são fatores importantes para uma revolução classista — uma vez que perante essa ideologia somos todos iguais se somos pobres.

Numa roda de conversa que tive com Erica Malunguinho, a primeira mulher transexual a ser eleita deputada em São Paulo, eu a questionei se numa hipotética revolução de classe teria triunfo sem antes uma conscientização de raça e gênero, ela me respondeu negativamente pontuando uma ideia da qual eu concordo: raça e gênero definem a classe! Contudo, o movimento negro, e aqui farei o uso de declarações feitas por duas mulheres transexuais e negras, Dália Costa e Onika Bibiana Sores, que identificam a falta de espaço do corpo negro e trans, e apontam a invisibilidade partida desse movimento da nossa vivência. Em que espaços o corpo transpreto ocupa no movimento feminista? Esse que frequentemente nos faz lembrar que somos machos vestidos de saia. E a militância negra, que está mais preocupada em infantilizar ações de homens negros cisgêneros do que pautar a multiplicidade da demanda dos nossos corpos negros que estão fora da regra da cisnormatividade e pontuam que o inimigo na verdade é outro. O movimento negro em Bauru age exatamente assim, nos faz crer que somos todos irmãos de raça e que estamos unidos a eles, mas muitas vezes excluem nossa afetividade — mais uma vez na crença que corpos negros e transexuais não pertencem a uma afetividade hétero! Ou seja, nos colocam novamente em uma posição masculina, nos pedem para que sejamos pacientes e dizem que a evolução de cada um precisa ser respeitada. Na hipocrisia de demonizar mulheres trans que são brancas e potencialmente racistas, e na infantilização de ações cometidas pela comunidade negra que é transfóbica ao nos colocar em uma posição de homem.

Janeiro é o mês da visibilidade trans — e hoje é o último dia. Essa é uma carta aberta sobre como é ser mulher transexual e travesti em Bauru. Como em toda minha manifestação política e artística eu sou assolada pela falta de amor que Bauru me negou, e não foi só a mim. A jovem poeta e transexual Alina Durso, teve sua afetividade destruída por homens e mulheres que participam de movimentos de resistência bauruense, e foi difamada por eles carregando o jargão de ser adicta e convidada a deixar Bauru. Trago a vocês também, a potente poética e vencedora do Slam SubVerso da cidade, Gaia Maria, que foi demonizada ao questionar atitudes transfóbicas partidas de movimentos feministas bauruenses, negada como mulher por componentes desse coletivo e silenciada pelas mesmas! Como se não bastasse, Gaia, questionou a falta de pautas transexuais em movimentos classistas da cidade, tendo como resposta que: “primeiramente a luta pela classe, e de resto é tudo pauta identitária”.

E infelizmente essas informações coesas são somente a ponta do iceberg, o silenciamento e a recusa dessas pautas sempre foi uma atitude constante desses coletivos fálicos da cidade. Enquanto a população a qual eu me direciono nesse texto não compreender a afetividade de mulheres transexuais como um fator importante no posicionamento delas nesses espaços, eu e outras mulheres transexuais e travestis não iremos, como diz o bordão: “segurar a suas mãos”, mãos que estão sujas de nosso sangue. Não cederemos a arma pro nosso próprio atirador, e se seu movimento não agrega a toda uma sociedade marginalizada, seja esses gordos, negros, mulheres cis, não-binárias, transexuais, travestis, deficientes, amarelos, indígenas e quaisquer outros indivíduos com situação marginalizada, o seu movimento nunca terá força. Finalizo esse texto com a afirmação de que viemos ao mundo com duas certezas: nascemos pelados e de resto é amor. E como diz Monna Brutal, quem não entende de amor, sente o peso do tambor.

As colunas são um espaço de opinião. As posições e argumentos expressas neste espaço não necessariamente refletem o ponto de vista do JORNAL DOIS.

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