Bruxismo

“Eu costumava identificar o humor do meu irmão pelo brilho dos olhos mas o brilho da tela sugou tudo dali”

Coluna publicada em 19 de janeiro de 2018

“Já percebeu que tá todo mundo meio perdido?” (Imagem: Reprodução/escultura de Johnson Tang)
Por Karol Lombardi, colunista do JORNAL DOIS

Entre a ressaca do ano novo e os paetês do carnaval eu me pego pensando no que realmente quero para 2018.

Minha inconstância não permitiu que eu fizesse a lista antes da meia noite e eu virei o ano como sempre, revirada por dentro.

O telefone não para um minuto, a timeline não me deixa encarar mais ninguém, o fundo dos olhos alheios se perderam no fundo da minha memória.

Eu costumava identificar o humor do meu irmão pelo brilho dos olhos mas o brilho da tela sugou tudo dali.

Voltando a lista que não fiz, é difícil elencar o que se quer quando não se sabe onde quer chegar.

Já percebeu que tá todo mundo meio perdido?

Já reparou quantos livros o Augusto Cury escreveu no ano passado? Isso me faz lembrar que não postei sequer um texto no blog que eu costumava manter. De onde ele tira tantas palavras positivas? Céus, que a inveja não me consuma.

Rascunhei algumas coisas no verso de uma rescisão no trabalho, voltar pra academia, comer melhor, começar terapia, ir ao médico, dentista, tirar carta, voltar pro inglês…parei.

Tive pena de mim. Quem jogaria para 2018 uma lista tão medíocre?

O telefone tocou, um cliente desejou um bom ano. Agradeci como quem lamentava.

Eu tô ligada no automático a quanto tempo?

Diacho!!! já é quase 17:30 e eu perdi a lista.

Dizem que se você faz a lista depois do dia 15 de janeiro a eficácia dos pedidos já não é a mesma, você perdeu o trem das realizações de 2018, vai continuar na estação dos likes da vida alheia. É o que dizem. Revirei os olhos, no calendário, dia 12.

Tentei ser otimista, nadando contra a maré dentro de mim mesma.

Porque quando eu era pequena uma folha de caderno parecia tão pouco, o ano parecia tão curto pra tudo que eu precisava fazer. Trancada no guarda roupa eu conspirava contra o mundo. Meus diários são a prova de que as listas davam certo.

Em que ano foi que eu perdi a passagem do trem ?

A ideia veio mas essa dor de cabeça que me mata… pronto! Preciso tratar esse maldito bruxismo senão logo se vão os dentes, mandíbula e nervos, isso pareceu o suficiente para um ano melhorzinho, afinal, quantos itens uma lista digna precisa ter?

Essenfelder diz que “com sorte, 2018 não caberá, daqui a 12 meses, em um tweet”, por sorte minha conta no twitter está bloqueada por tempo indeterminado.

As colunas são um espaço de opinião. As posições e argumentos expressas neste espaço não necessariamente refletem o ponto de vista do JORNAL DOIS.

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